This is what I do the night before Mission Trip

Yes, write on my blogpage.  When it comes down to it, I really don't have much else to do.  But I don't really want to talk about that.  And that statement doesn't need to be expounded upon either. But hey! I drew this picture for the Chapel bulletin yesterday.  The commissioning service was encouraging: I'm anxious, and nervous, and scared! My third year on Mission Trip, and I have no idea why God is calling me to go!  He's never made me do these things alone though, for which I am grateful.  Pray for me?


You know, random things are happening again.  I had a nightmare about a white rabbit.  And I'm terribly ill-equipped to be any kind of sentient being.  My thoughts go everywhere, but rarely do they take the time to finish themselves. And that is the most frustrating thing.  I have a friend (I ALWAYS have a friend) who enjoys attacking the thoughtlessness he sees in girls of his acquaintance.  That heads other than my friend's are devoid of intelligent thought.   And then I cringe and think What if he's right? And then I evaluate what I was previously thinking (I need to wash these shoes, This is a terrible day for a picnic, etc) and wonder if I'm under that category.  I fall asleep in class.  The only things I can really follow through with are literature and the Bible.  I really only pick up things from other people, so it's as if I don't really exist as a separate entity.


Goodness. I need to be
packed in tightly, like poetry
and unpacked again, like
a packing crate of music
boxes.  God loves variety.


This is my stated state of current.  I blame all this wordsmashing on a prophet of my acquaintance.

Zerbin Concert!

These guys played at Concordia, and though it was a small crowd, I think they're going to have a good fan base starting up here. I was inspired and delighted by the sound of this Edmonton-based Christian rock band - the sudden stops and the AMAZING drumming were the hooks in my heart, and Zerbin's vocals (though sadly a little too quiet) were the pleasant pull into their solid musical world.

Sara Isabel opened and created some lovely moments, especially in her rendition of Dylan's "Long Black Coat".

And all proceeds went towards the Concordia Mission Trip! Only five more days!  

A's of Apology

As someone who avoids conflict, denies it, and indeed runs and hides in a little box away from it, this Peacemaker's retreat was a needed refocusing time.  Daryl Becker was leading, an excellent teacher and speaker using the Peacemakers program and humorous video clips to get us thinking about mediation and forgiveness.  There was a SNL skit where a psychologist simply yelled "Stop it!" whenever a lady told him her issues.  Obviously, not the way to help someone through their problems (:  Some great Law/ Gospel stuff too.  We also reviewed the 7 A's of a holistic apology:

1. Address everyone involved

2. Avoid if, and, or but

3. Admit specifically: your sinful attitudes, words, and actions

4. Acknowledge hurt: expressing sorrow for hurting someone

5. Accept the consequences: such as making restitution

6. Alter your behavior: promise to change attitudes and actions

7. Ask for forgiveness and allow for time: depending on the severity of the conflict, the other party may require time to deal with their hurt and consider the apology.

This is really useful way to approach apologies- we used them on CREW all the time, and the As really get you to go over the whole situation and take responsibility for how you contributed to the conflict.  And yes, it leaves you incredibly vulnerable!  But Christ himself was beaten, abused, and killed, and while He hung, reviled and abandoned on the cross, He forgave the people who had done all these things to Him!  He forgives us though we mess up all the time!  And instead of wiping out humanity (resolving conflict-"fixing" the problem) Jesus died so that so that we could be reconciled to Him and live in peace with Him forever.  And we can now offer and accept that forgiveness as well in our own lives, spreading love and ending grudge cycles.

I often forget to see conflict as an opportunity to give God glory, deal with my own sinfulness, strengthen relationships, and minister to those who need to hear God's word of grace and forgiveness in the midst of hardship.  I'm thankful that God used this weekend to remind me of that.

"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." ~Ephesians 4:32